Short lesson: Where does the voice come from?
Self-talk is automatic; a program if you will.
A deeply engrained habit that will continue to influence everything in our lives.
Everything from our results…
- The amount of money we make.
- The quality of relationships we have.
- The quality of life we experience.
- The speed of progress we create.
To our happiness.
It’s all a byproduct of the internal program creating the self-talk you experience.
Similar to a computer, you can have a program that benefits you (software) or one that destroys you (virus).
Negative self-talk is a virus… a subconscious program reinforcing fear, failure, and scarcity.
It’s the first indicator of your current “state” both emotionally and mentally.
A positive state is gratitude, joy, and love.
A negative state is worry, shame, and frustration.
So how do we shift our inner voice? And why is this important?
It’s important because as mentioned: your mental and emotional state dictate the quality of your life and results. Your self-talk is an indicator of your mental and emotional state.
To shift (reprogram) your self-talk we have two approaches:
Change your state.
In order to quiet the voice, and stop the negative spiral we can shift our state.
“Feeling” is a word we created to describe what state we are aware of being in.
It starts with emotion.
You can’t be in a positive emotion, and a negative mental state at the same time.
Gratitude is my favorite method.
How cool is it that you are alive? That you even get to have “problems”? How much do you love your family? What is your favorite kind of food, and how does it make you feel? Isn’t life bad ass, even when it’s hard?
There’s tons to be grateful for.
Once you notice the negative voice creeping in, acknowledge it.
And then choose to step into a better state.
Upgrade the voice.
Another method is to listen.
What is the voice saying?
Catch it.
Write it down, or say it out loud.
Reframe it, and replace it.
Examples:
“I’m overwhelmed” → “I can do this, one step at a time.”
“I’m behind” → “I’m right where I need to be. And I’m headed to where I want to go.”
“Why do I keep getting stuck?” → “Woah, there must be something for me to learn. What is this trying to teach me?”
I also recommend incantations (no not affirmations).
The difference?
Affirmations: saying something you think will make you feel better, or change who you are.
Incantations: using emotion while exclaiming how you feel and who you are.
One is based on hope.
The other on scientific evidence:
Our brain doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality.
Emotions or experiences we think of, are as powerful as ones we live through.
Incantations use emotion, and body language to anchor in what we say deep into our mind.
Reprogramming the “virus” that has been holding us back, and fueling the negative self-talk.
Hope this helps you, like it’s helped me over the years.
